I don’t think many people know this about me, but I experience anxiety on a day to day basis. From social, to work, to everyday life, anxiety is something I didn’t even know I has until recently.
Why didn’t I know this was the cause of all my rushing emotions at certain times? Perhaps it’s because of the lack of education and talk around the topic. Or perhaps I’ve known all along, but just been in denial. I can’t pin point it for sure, but one thing I do know is that it’s something I become more and more aware of as I get older, and yes, Google helps too.
I have never been the one to crack under pressure or lose my cool public. Instead I let the stress build and build until, eventually, I break down without warning. After an explosion of tears the stress starts to slip away, only to start building pressure all over again.
Lately though, I’ve felt a lot more anxiety in social settings. I’ve always been shy at first, but now I find myself making plans with my closest friends only to look for ways to get out of it only days or hours before. My anxiety doesn’t stop there though.
Change. This is one word that gets my heart racing, and not in a good way. The slightest change in plans spike my heart rate and I can feel my muscles tense. To me, the feeling is best described as a bottle of sparkling water. Even the slightest shake builds u enough pressure to spray you and those around you with water.
And that is something I don’t think is mentioned often enough. Anxiety doesn’t just affect the person suffering from it, but their friends and family too.
Why am I telling you this? Well it’s simple. I’m on a mission to learn how to control the thoughts and feelings that cause my anxiety and share them with you in hopes of helping you deal with it too.
I’ll be documenting my journey right here and would love to know how anxiety has affected your life and how you deal with it.